Funny Status Messages

wikiLeaks_informer: I don't get jealous when i see my 'EX' wid someone else.. coz my grand ma always told me to give my old toys to the less Fortunate !! =)) =D 11 Dislike
Polygraph: My bank lets me send a text message and it'll text back with my balance. ..It's a cool feature but I didn't think the 'LOL' was necessary. 11 Dislike
Mark: I could eat my watch, but that would be time consuming. 11 Dislike
trickz100: - Sometimes I think the world would be much better without so much technology. ~ Sent from my iPhone. 11 Dislike
Jokesta: While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it…thanks Mario Kart. 11 Dislike
twix: girls with asses like mine do not talk to boys with faces like urs 10 Dislike
twix: some people say that love can be found in every corner in the world , news flash-------> the world is round 10 Dislike
Abdullah: Girls take 5million pictures trying to get the best one, when guys take 1, barley glance at it, and say its fine :D ! 10 Dislike
Alex Black: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTVWXYZ. Oh damn! I missed U! :) 10 Dislike
Somebody: somewhere some fat ugly girls are singing... dooont stop believing 10 Dislike

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Last post by Bobbyboo on 03/09/2010 04:24:07 PM GMT

karl t What not to say to a cop if your pulled over: What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" YOU'RE the trained specialist.
Posted by karl t 29/08/2010 11:56 PM 4 Like
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Malina Got arrested for opening the cop's zippers....Apparently i have misunderstood the meaning of "Please blow Ma'am"
Posted by Malina 21/08/2010 09:10 AM 8 Like
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karl t , Alcohol does NOT make you fat...it makes you lean...against tables,chairs,walls, floors and ....Ugly people!!!
Posted by karl t 20/08/2010 08:44 PM 6 Like
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Nicole Evans thinks that 100-calorie packs have just enough cookies to piss me off!!
Posted by Nicole Evans 20/08/2010 04:46 PM 1 Like
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Nicole Evans is pretty tired of these kids running lemonade stands acting like they've never even heard of vodka before.
Posted by Nicole Evans 20/08/2010 04:43 PM 5 Like
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elma Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
Posted by elma 19/08/2010 11:42 AM 9 Like
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KARL T Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and then a diet coke?
Posted by KARL T 18/08/2010 03:45 PM 8 Like
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rahi20594 Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
Posted by rahi20594 14/08/2010 12:49 PM 1 Like
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Nathan.n is biting the heads off jelly babies
Posted by Nathan.n 12/08/2010 08:00 PM 4 Like
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Somebody hmm..bored time to open the fridge again jk im fasting
Posted by Somebody 12/08/2010 04:09 PM 5 Like
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Alex Ruiz Hot dogs give me energy to fight my demons.
Posted by Alex Ruiz 12/08/2010 02:46 AM 3 Like
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karl t . If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
Posted by karl t 12/08/2010 01:13 AM 4 Like
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Rick R Got arrested at the Gatorade convention. I guess standing behind the women and whispering "is it in you?" was the wrong thing to do.
Posted by Rick R 11/08/2010 01:00 PM 8 Like
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Abdullah Next time you go to a restaurant and ask for a Coke, and they say "is Pepsi OK?", you should reply "is Monopoly money OK?"
Posted by Abdullah 10/08/2010 12:45 PM 8 Like
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steven tyler i'll be burger king and i'll have it my way and you'll be Mcdonalds and you'll be lovin it :)
Posted by steven tyler 03/08/2010 04:54 AM 8 Like
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Rye Keg Stands: Gymnastics for college students since the 1960's.
Posted by Rye 03/08/2010 02:57 AM 2 Like
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MARKeMARK SCREW IT !! I'ma spend my cab fare on shots... I'll just take an ambulance home
Posted by MARKeMARK 30/07/2010 07:22 PM 7 Like
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Rick R is happy that McDonald's doesn't sell hot dogs. I don't think I could order a McWeiner with a straight face! Can you imagine super-sizing it
Posted by Rick R 30/07/2010 01:18 PM 3 Like
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Rick R My wifes cooking is amazing!!! Even the smoke alarm cheers her on.
Posted by Rick R 26/07/2010 12:51 PM 2 Like
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Peter this is 'touch a boob for a beer' week happenin every night at ROJO's bar, well if u get slapped at least hey u get a beer
Posted by Peter 24/07/2010 02:47 AM 1 Like
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