funny status messages

 


Last post by jumbojim on 10/07/2017 11:42:43 PM GMT
  • keetojb Nothing is impossible.. Never Give Up.. I know a guy that once actually guessed correctly why his girlfriend was mad at him
    Posted by keetojb  17/02/2017 03:14 PM  31 Like
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  • keetojb I commend any woman for going into labor outside a hospital setting. If I have to poop anywhere besides my own bathroom I go into panic mode
    Posted by keetojb  04/01/2017 12:22 AM  22 Like
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  • sirdawko I had to take the batteries out of my carbon monoxide alarm.The loud beeping was giving me a headache and making me feel sick and dizzy!
    Posted by sirdawko  17/12/2015 09:51 AM  7 Like
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  • SCOTLAND73 It's not difficult to tell crocodiles and alligators apart. One will see you in a while whereas the other will see you later.
    Posted by SCOTLAND73  23/11/2015 12:38 AM  7 Like
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  • guest If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, there is no question. I would want them to be alive.
    Posted by guest  25/10/2015 12:20 AM  6 Like
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  • keetojb I hate when all the silverware is dirty and I'm down to using the giant decorative fork that hangs on the wal
    Posted by keetojb  08/10/2015 10:15 PM  9 Like
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  • Somebody If your having a bad day, remember that somewhere on this big planet, someone just lost their straw in a capri sun!!
    Posted by Somebody  29/09/2015 09:28 PM  2 Like
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  • keetojb Be thankful your GPS doesn't get PMS: “Fine! Turn whichever way you want! You never listen to me anyway!”
    Posted by keetojb  06/09/2015 03:59 PM  3 Like
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  • sirdawko A man aged 24 drowned on his own stag do..... Personally, I'd never stick my face in deer sh*t.
    Posted by sirdawko  25/08/2015 06:37 PM  2 Like
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