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Top Ten
Brasstoff
I heard that if I stood on Mars I would weigh 20% less. I now know this to be false! Does anyone want to buy 48 flattened chocolate bars?
148
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Kwesta
For the conceited people: if i ever decide to commit suicide, all i would do is jump from YOUR EGO TO YOUR IQ-LEVEL :D
7
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@TsirAhXuan
DURING THE SUMMER: Everyday I'm shufflin' DURING THE WINTER: Everyday I'm shovelin'
7
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unknown
i am a lion hear me ROAR.....meow.
7
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sirdawko
last night I saw a guy in a Man Utd shirt drowning in a frozen canal so I saved him...as the screensaver on my phone.
7
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@bigwmo77
Isnt it funny how you can be thinking about someone and they suddenly appear infront of you, My dad just caught me w*nking
7
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@romeofthesouth
commented on your photo
7
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Somebody
That awkward moment when God asks Beyonce 'who run the world'...
7
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achduliebescheisse
Living the dream, one nightmare at a time.
7
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@romeofthesouth
is back from A&E, broken leg and bruised ribs. Will be seeing a solicitor on Monday... Red Bull does NOT give you wings! Lying b*stards!!
7
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Last post by Rex on 24/01/2019 07:03:59 PM GMT
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@lelomgb
I dont care how hot you are ,dumb is not attractive
Posted by
@lelomgb
27/10/2018 01:13 PM
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Rex
Are the 2 "ee"s in bee silent?
Posted by
Rex
26/08/2018 05:22 PM
1
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@rick0276
A year ago today, I was supposed to go drinking with Chester Bennington, but he just left me hanging.
Posted by
@rick0276
24/07/2018 02:49 PM
1
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Rex
All these suicide bombers got zero respect for all the goats theyve left widdowed
Posted by
Rex
27/05/2017 11:53 PM
6
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gussyg
My girlfriend wanted me to come shopping, but I had a headache... I must have caught it from her last night when we didn't have sex.
Posted by
gussyg
25/03/2017 01:15 PM
6
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Shafique.K
This one time...I didnt see time or date....since then I call it 'this one time'.
Posted by
Shafique.K
10/12/2016 11:47 AM
6
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Phil
If somebody reads a newspaper from a long time ago then are they reading the news, or are they reading the olds?
Posted by
Phil
14/02/2016 01:44 AM
6
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A Monkey
They say that if life give you lemons, make lemonade. What if life gives you lemonade though?
Posted by
A Monkey
20/10/2015 08:12 PM
2
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Gabe
OMG I met the perfect guy! Maybe I can fix him. - Women.
Posted by
Gabe
13/07/2015 02:48 PM
2
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The Grumpy Git
I don't see why people are so concerned by the drop in bee population. They've clearly never been stung by one. Or a wasp.
Posted by
The Grumpy Git
20/06/2015 12:33 PM
1
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The Grumpy Git
Election day: the day when you get to choose which position to be f*cked in for the next 5 years.
Posted by
The Grumpy Git
07/05/2015 09:18 AM
6
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Marc
Common sense is no longer that common.
Posted by
Marc
04/05/2015 05:48 PM
6
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DavidNg
We have a bribery problem around here. No one seems to think I'm important enough to bribe.
Posted by
DavidNg
27/04/2015 08:11 PM
6
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Gabe
Apparently both Bill and Hillary Clinton like private servers...
Posted by
Gabe
11/03/2015 03:32 PM
6
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dreSHak
Chip clips are for quitters.
Posted by
dreSHak
28/01/2015 09:01 AM
4
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sirdawko
Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end!
Posted by
sirdawko
26/01/2015 11:37 AM
5
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@pinktiewizard
My nephew thinks clowns are scarier than bats... I guess he loved the comics I gave him last christmas.
Posted by
@pinktiewizard
23/12/2014 07:02 AM
3
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Rex
What a sucker, Just paid £900 for a vac!
Posted by
Rex
06/12/2014 04:32 PM
6
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Acolyte
Half the sh*t you think I don't know, I found out a long time ago.
Posted by
Acolyte
18/11/2014 01:50 PM
5
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TheLoveDoctor
Instead of donating my body to science, I'll donate it to whoever has the best idea for a practical joke involving a dead body.
Posted by
TheLoveDoctor
07/11/2014 03:47 PM
6
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