funny status messages

 


Last post by CopyCat on 17/01/2018 12:44:03 AM GMT
  • jonnyg I ordered an Asian hooker last night. She showed up 2 hours late. She loved me wrong time
    Posted by jonnyg  27/12/2017 03:16 PM  6 Like
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  • sirdawko Please be careful out on the roads over the festive period.A lot of guys have been drinking so consequently their Mrs is driving!
    Posted by sirdawko  24/12/2017 01:51 PM  3 Like
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  • stepfplum They say a dog park is a great place to pick up girls. I don't have a dog so I am walking around with a bag of poop so I won't look weird.
    Posted by stepfplum  25/11/2017 04:57 PM  7 Like
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  • Rex The recent earthquake in mexico registered as 7.1 on the Richter scale anything above 8 should be measured on a rectum scale
    Posted by Rex  20/09/2017 10:03 AM  3 Like
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  • sirdawko Liven up boring long haul flights by pressing the stewardess call button & then when she comes 2 your seat just say "NO I CAN'T FLY A PLANE"
    Posted by sirdawko  12/09/2017 07:50 AM  4 Like
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  • sirdawko My wife says shes leaving me because I exaggerate too much. So I slapped her with my 16 inch cock.
    Posted by sirdawko  12/09/2017 07:49 AM  3 Like
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  • Brasstoff I heard that if I stood on Mars I would weigh 20% less. I now know this to be false! Does anyone want to buy 48 flattened chocolate bars?
    Posted by Brasstoff  04/09/2017 09:54 PM  148 Like
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